The Sacrifice

Sounds like a crappy horror film, doesn't it? Well, it's not even close.

They say God works in mysterious ways (not love... but then God is love... so...), but I guess he works more mysteriously during the Holy days?

I played Anton Chigurh's game a while ago because I can't make up my mind on a decision. I can't remember the last time I had fussed all over decision-making, that is not entirely work-related. In No Country for Old Men, Anton is a vile creature who is not aware of the word mercy. When a hapless human being crosses paths with him, his/her life is totally reduced to dirt, at the stake of a toss-coin. No, I was not about to kill anybody, but since I can't make up my mind, I tossed a 1-peso coin. Jose's head showed up which meant I should go.

But something came up, thus the blog entry title.

In a very remote way, I'd like to think I'm like Chris McCandless. (Though he died because he was not hesitant, I will probly die because of hesitation.) He made a big sacrifice as big as life itself and made more little ones along the way. But I guess we both have resilient spirits (and Chris also has problems with the Catholic church), and though it may not show, like him, I have "no problem recognizing a supreme being and calling it God", like in the words of Ron, the last friendship he formed along the way. (Read/watch Into the Wild.)

I have unholy deeds and unorthodox words oftentimes come out of my mouth. I try not to despise people despite the despicable characters of a lot of them. I curb my misanthropic other half and oftentimes allow much room for Mr. Bright-side. The past 6 years of my life is made up of big and small sacrifices. When I think of it, it's a hell of a lot even. So why is this recently-added "sac" (oh so I have my own word for it now) even much of a big deal. God knows I have been a truly good soon. A goddamn rare find.